Friday, October 26, 2012

her name.

I think when you know, you know.
At least I do.
Well...by "know" I mean, stop searching when you find it.
A name I mean...for one's offspring.

Cale was never going to be anything other than Cale.  In fact, I don't even think we were pregnant when Tim suggested the name to me.  I'm not sure I  did much looking at all for anything else before we found out the gender.  And once we knew it was a boy, we also knew his middle - to be named after Tim.
Megersa was going to be Jace.
If you're interested enough to look back to our adoption process before we got our referral, I did refer to M as Jace for a time.  I thought it fit well with Cale and could picture it being used on our little brown boy. :)
But after seeing his little face, and saying his Ethiopian name over and over to people, I thought...well, why not keep it?  Or if not that, then at least an Ethiopian name.  I did some looking for one we might have liked better, but decided there really wasn't one, and ultimately decided we'd keep his name.
...Though I do think the name Henok is cool for anyone considering Ethiopian adoption! ;)
The twins.
MORE boys.
I did a little girl name research before that 12 week ultrasound where they let me know we were getting 2 more doses of testosterone our way...but of course, nothing solid.
I worked as a nurses aide for several years before we were married and that first year or so after.
So I became accustomed to old man names...and became quite a fan of their strength, and unpopularness (is that a word?)
There was just the sweetest old fat man name Thad.  All of the aides affectionately referred to him as 'Thaddy-Daddy.'
"How about Thaddeus?"  I asked Tim.
"I knew a Thad once...he was cool.  I like it....it sounds epic."
Excellent!! :)
One twin named.
One more to go.
I was/am still quite fond of the name Marshall.
Tim seemed okay with it, but I sensed it wasn't his favorite.
.....Okay, so you know when you're trying to come up with a name for your child, and your spouse suggests some name that you dont like?  So you give them that look like you smelled something bad?
Well, I don't care for that.
I told Tim he couldn't make faces anymore, but just needed to give me a rating from 1-10.
He gave Marshall a 6.
Well, that's no good.  In my opinion, it's gotta be at least an 8.
Zachery?
Zac.  Thad and Zac?  They sounded good together.....
But we kept getting the comment: "Oh, that's a pretty common name compared to your other boys..."
And when I like a name, I don't really care what other people say.  When I commit to it, I mean.
A close family member ridiculed the name Cale when first told: "It sounds like a fish."
Didn't care.
But the comments about the name Zac did bug me.  Because I was sorta thinking the same thing.  So, I kept looking...
I remember it was around Christmas-time 2010, and I was blogging a ton.  Reading other blogs too, which I rarely do now... but a link from a friends blog to another blog got me curious.
This new blogger was a good writer and I got caught up in her family.
Her oldest was named Shepherd.
Yep.
Oh, I got a crush on that name.
"Shepherd??  Rate it." 
"Do we really want to change his name again?"  was Tim's reply - but I gave him my most pitiful/hopeful look and he said he'd think about it.
Not long after, the great people of Facebook weighed in on their opinions of Shepherd vs Zachery.
Hands down were votes for Shepherd.
And I won was relieved to have found it.  My 4th son's name.  We stopped looking.

Fast forward to this pregnancy.
Knowing how good ultrasound techs are in this day and age I knew if there was any girl name searching to be done, it'd have to be before that...because if they announced it was another boy, well that was most likely it for us.  And I wouldn't get to ask google for help on baby girl's name...
We found out about the pregnancy at around 6 weeks...so that gave us about 6 more weeks to find a name.
Okay, not really us...me.
I present the name...Tim gives me a rating.  That's our system.  And it works.
Poppy was the yardstick by which to measure a potential daughters name.
I still love it, but we are passing on it.
I love that it reminds me of MY Poppy who passed away just before we found out we were pregnant with Cale (his first great-grandchild).  I like that it's earthy - it's literally the name of a red flower.
It's spunky but pretty - how I pictured a daughter of mine to be.
But it had drawbacks.  My DAD chose to assume the name Poppy as his grandfather name.  I was sorta hoping he'd choose something else, because I associated the name with his father...but he didn't.
And I thought it might be weird.
Tim and I went back and forth on this... Then there's the potential for the mean nickname of Poopy. :(
Yeah, I know...it's a little funny, but certainly wouldn't be funny for her..............
and I wasn't sure how it would translate to an adult name.
Still, we held it in highest regards.  I kept looking though...
Other top contenders:
Clementine (much more my favorite than Tim's - drawback for me: no clear nickname)
Dove (nixed because Dove Nester - dove in a nest?)
Primrose (nixed because of the movie Hunger Games and it's popularity with me not being a die-hard fan...and the potential for the nn Rosie.  I don't know why I don't like it....)
Bay (definitely earthy...spunky, but I don't know...not enough of a name?)
Back to Poppy.
I liked it a lot. I really did.  I got countless opinions on the name...mainly in favor of it, but...I figured I might as well keep doing the research in case there was a name that we liked better.
I'm sure it's just the movies influence...but I did actually ask Tim if he liked the name Snow.  It's true.  We both did like it, but quickly decided we couldn't take that sort of leap with our daughters name.
We weren't that big of hippies. ;)
Haha.

Oh, at some point in all my research I found out we were indeed having a little girl....so that just intensified my search.
Had this been a boy...here were the names we sort of agreed on:
Malak Kade
Hogarth Kade
Oz Bartholemew
Yeah...for real. ;)

But she's a she...and in my opinion, a she name is a lot hard to come by!!
Oh, the hours I spent searching for her name............
Well, lets just say - it was a bit time consuming.
I wanted something NON-trendy.  Not in the top 50 most popular names...or even the top 100 if I could help it.  I looked at a million baby name sites, searched through the Bible - for females or even cool sounding places... Walked in our side yard (which happens to be a graveyard) to read all the tombstones hoping for inspiration.  Had a "pronunciation guide" bookmarked on my laptop to hear how someone else would say a name... grilled my teacher friends/families for their best girl names (or popular ones to avoid)...and asked dozens of others for suggestions on "unique but feminine" girl names...
And I was still lacking.  I sorta thought we may end up settling.
Or  we'd be that couple who gives birth and still has nothing to call their kid.
No.  We wouldn't do that...haha.  I'm not sure how that even happens.
Don't get me wrong...I LIKE a lot of names...but liking isn't loving.
And you gotta put some love, care and consideration into someone else's name.
They'll have it for life.
It'll define them.
And I want one solid one...not a selection of "favorites" - because I hear this "we waited to see him/her before we decided."  Well...what if Mom thinks she looks like a Sally and Dad thinks she looks like a Penelope?  Then what?  I was determine to avoid all of that.

The perfect name was out there...I just needed to keep looking.
One night, as I sat on my bed...still looking at baby name blogs/sites...I googled "winter baby girl names"  I found this name:
Neve.  The Italian word for snow.
Snow?  How funny!
I got that feeling...............
It fit the bill:
It was short (and I was secretly hoping for a short name to match Cale - seeing as how all the other brothers have long names)...
It was certainly unique.  Only other Neve I know is Neve Cambell from the old show 'Party of Five.'  It was spunky, but feminine. 
I liked the alliteration of Neve Nester.
Though meanings aren't terribly important, I don't want it to mean something like "horse farm" - and it didn't...
Neve means "bright and radiant."

Awesome.... because she will be.

I had to text Tim.
I'm not sure I asked him to rate it...just said that I was pretty sure I found her name and listed the above reasons I liked it so much.
He seemed interested and said he'd think on it.
I questioned a friend to see what she thought.  She said she didn't care much for it...
But...that didn't bother me!
So.  That was it for me, another sign. ;)
Just had to wait on the hubby.
While he was at work the next day I asked him if he was ready to commit to the name cuz I was.  Commit meaning announce it on facebook.  :) lol.  He was.
And so I did.  
Her middle name will be Eloise.
We like namesakes for middles...and there is one lady whom I know I always remember.
So, as a nod to her, may I "announce" the fact that Neve Eloise Nester finally has a name.
Yes, before she is born.
No, we are not planning on changing it.
Because I know - and I have not looked at one other name since finding it. ;)

*Oh, and it's pronounced Nev, but we like the extra e on the end.  
Too bad if you don't. :)

Thursday, October 25, 2012

copout

Well, yes and no.
I mean, technically this post is somewhat of a cop-out.  Reason being...I DID have a post I was working on, but as I read through it, it didn't seem to go anywhere...or make sense as a solitary post?  I don't know...it's me being particular again.
I'll have to work on it more when I'm not preoccupied.
So, instead I'm going to post a link.
Sort of a cop-out with regards to me promising another good post (because I made another good dinner)...but not so much when you consider the meaning of this post, and how long it took me to get this "present" together for my husband who turned 30 on October 12, 2012.
Trying to be creative for your husband's birthday while on a budget isn't always easy.
Google was no help.....
Lots of fluffy suggestions along the lines of: 
"Have a picnic dinner in a park...
Write a love poem...
Gaze into each others eyes..."
Meh.  ;)
I wanted my husband to feel special on his big day, and though plans for an 'over-the-hill' party sounded good to me, I do know parties are not my husband's deal...

So...I redirected.
30.
Yeah...I know he's old. ;)
A pinterest pinner gave their significant other 30 balloons with pictures - one for each year of their life tied to a string.
Cute...probably not realistic for me to get those off his mother.....
How about 30 memories of him?
Yeah...I could certainly cook up something like that.

But was there something else that might be even more special to Tim??
We've got 5 people here who really love him...I was pretty certain there were at least 25 more...
I could get at least 30 peoples who love him to say Happy Birthday to him.
A video with voices would be my first choice...but certainly not tangible given the time-frame I had before his the day arrived.
But the pictures?  30 pictures...
And so, 2 weeks out from his birthday I made the decision.
Facebook would be the easiest way to get the biggest grouping of people in one inbox message...but I also did a LOT of texting and some emailing.
Here was the original post:

I would love all of your help for Tim's birthday!
I'm not asking you to drive to Maryland, or even send him a present!!!! ;)
What I would LOVE is if each of you (wives who may know Tim through your husband - I appeal to you as the "get things done" person instead of sending this msg to your husbands...) to:
TAKE A PICTURE OF you, your kids, family...or even just your husbands with a sign saying "Happy 30th Birthday Tim!" anywhere in your area... preferably outside, but really, just getting 30 is challenging enough! ;)
I would SO appreciate it.
We are low on funds, and I think this would be super special for him.
...plus, everyone has a camera on their phone right? :)
Send your pics to me at:
630-903-4755 or
fredericknesters@gmail.com

His birthday isn't until Oct 12, so you have some time...but I'd really like to get 30 people doing this so send them when you can!
THANKS SO MUCH!!


 ...If only it was as easy as this one post, right?  It took a LOT of harassing encouraging on my part.  And up until about 11pm on the night before his birthday I was still getting pics sent to me.
But it worked out.  Superbly.
I was super happy with the involvement, no matter how long it took.
My husband was so happy and touched I was able to accomplish this for him and was super excited to see his good friends/family participate in the fun.

I could get all mushy/gushy and continue on to how in love I still am with my Tim, and what he means to me...how much I rely on him without even thinking of it...that God truly blessed ME when Tim started "chasing" after me...but that'd just make you all uncomfortable, right? :)

SO...instead, I end with the video.
And one last line to say that even though I'm married to an old man now, I'm glad it's Tim Nester. :)


Wednesday, October 24, 2012

blogging...like cooking.

I'm no experienced cook.
I enjoy it, sure...and my husband and children seem fat and happy well fed and satisfied.
But I get into "moods" about it.
Some weeks I will cook a meal every day...the fridge is stocked with hearty leftovers and I know my husband will be in a mighty fine mood!
Then there's those days...even stretching to a week or more where I could care less about being in the kitchen.  I don't feel like making dinner...the "empty" fridge stresses me out as I am forced to come up with creative solutions for dinner - those are the weeks we eat a lot of eggs, pancakes, sandwiches...  Not as fun for hubby.

Same thing goes for my blogging.  Sometimes I get super motivated and can crank out like 10 different posts...I'll save the extras and use them as leftovers - always having something to say.
Then there's those times where I stare at my home page and wonder why no one is blogging anything new.  Unlike cooking, I can let the inactivity go on and on.
But, I'm happier when I have posts there.  I quite like going back to read what happened a few months ago...even a few years ago!
The details can quickly slip from ones mind, can't they?  Well, at least my pregnant-taking-care-of-4-kids-day-in-and-day-out brain.  I'm glad my blog can be my memory.

So...all that to say, yesterday I made a nice dinner.
My child who was upstairs showering popped out of the bathroom and yelled "HEY!  I know what that smell is...we're having meatloaf!  I LOVE meatloaf!!"
And he does.  We all do...which makes it a "nice" dinner.  ...When there's no throwing food or silent stand-offs. 
Tonight Tim will be at work, so dinner will be a kiddie dinner.
But I feel like I might cook something nice on Thursday night.
And maybe even blog again...
I guess we'll just have to wait and see... :)